Who is the Judge?

I am not into politics or likely to get into a political debate. This does not mean that I do not care, because I do. I am worried about our country and I am worried about who will be the next President. However, I am doing what I can do: praying for the outcome. Praying that God will give us all wisdom as we consider who to elect as our next President. Everyone has an opinion on who is best and most people have a lot to say about the candidates that are running. All you have to do is turn on the news or scroll through Facebook to see what people have to say. People are lashing out in anger and saying lots of things about the candidates. This reminded me about a passage in John 8 where a woman was caught in adultery. The law in that time was that the woman was to be stoned to death. As the people questioned Jesus He said to them, "Let anyone of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." The people began to slowly go away, Jesus turned to the woman and said to her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" to which the woman replied, "No one, sir." Jesus said to her, "Then neither do I condemn you, go and sin no more."

As we are tempted to judge the people and their actions around us, I want to remind us all, that we are not the judge and jury of others, only God is.

I was reading my devotions this morning and I came across a VERY timely message from the Psalms, which we can apply to the political situation we are currently facing. This next portion of this blog is taken from Warren Wiersbe's commentary entitled Be Exultant.

In Psalm 94 we can see that few problems cause God's people to question His rule more than "Why do the helpless and the godly suffer and the wicked get away with their crimes?" This Psalm (94) teaches us that the righteous have four responsibilities:

1) Praying to the Lord for Justice (vv.1-7) God's requirement for His people is that they "do justly...love mercy, and...walk humbly with their God" (Micah 6:8), for the lord loves justice and hears the prayers of those who have been treated unjustly. Since the Lord is omniscient, He is able to judge motives as well as actions that deal with situations and people justly (Lev. 19:18; Deut. 32:34, 41; Rom. 12:17-21; Heb. 10:30-31). We want the Lord to act immediately, but He is gracious and longsuffering (Ex.34:6-7), and we must walk by faith (Luke 18:1-8). The wicked convince themselves that God does not see their evil deeds (v.7), but He does!

2) Warning the Wicked of Their Danger (vv. 8-11) After praying to the Lord, we must confront the wicked with the truth, as the Lord gives us opportunity. If God is able to rule the nations by His providential decrees (Acts 17:24-28), is He unable to deal with a band of wicked officials who are breaking His law and exploiting His people? The subversive plans and plots of these evil leaders cannot be hidden from the Lord, nor will they go unpunished. Paul quoted this verse in 1 Corinthians 3:20 to warn church leaders in Corinth not to try to guide the church using the world's wisdom, but to rely only on the wisdom of God found in Scripture-the gold, silver, and precious stones (Proverbs 2:1-4; 3:13-15; 8:10-11, 18-19).

3) Accepting God's Discipline (vv. 12-15) The psalmist recognized the fact that the difficulties of life could help him mature in his faith. If God immediately rescued His people from their personal difficulties, they would become "spoiled brats" and never grow in faith or character. There is coming a time of judgment, but the Lord will spare His people from it. The psalmist believed in the justice of God, the future judgment of the wicked, and the promise of a righteous kingdom for the upright in heart.

4) Working with God for Justice (vv. 16-23) The psalmist  was experiencing the devious plots of the evil leaders and cried out to God for help. He knew the judges were twisting the law to exploit the poor (v.20), and he was slipping into a deep and dangerous situation.

In evil days, we give thanks that we have the Lord as our refuge and fortress. But we hid in Him, not that we may escape responsibility, but that we might be equipped to go forth and fight the enemy. 

In the end it is the Lord who knows the hearts of people and who will judge justly.-Warren Wiersbe

As I was typing this I also thought of a quote from Ann Voskamp, that states: 

"The hard things will be for good, the good things will be forever, the best things are forthcoming."

Remember who the Judge is, accept that He knows best and let him who is without sin cast the first stone to those you are wanting to judge. I make mistakes, I mess up and I would not want the whole world talking trash about me, think before you speak (or type). 

Unbelief

As I was doing my devotions this morning several things I was reading really resonated with me. It's an area where I struggle...get it under control...then struggle again. 

I am sure you can relate. 

The first thought that really captured my attention was from Warren Wiersbe, "While it's normal for us to hope for a quick way of escape and important for us to understand our feelings and circumstances, it's far more important to look to God and ask for His help."(emphasis mine)

I have to admit that this stepped on my toes a bit. I chewed on that thought for a few minutes as I have things I want God to fix right away (hello, genie in the bottle?), but at times I forget to look to God and actually ask for His help...I'd rather complain about the problem than go to the one Who could fix it...anybody else struggle with that?!

Anyway, I moved on and kept going when a few minutes later the second thought hit hard, "Unbelief almost always underestimates God and magnifies our personal weakness and problems. Unbelief sees only giants, problems, impossibility and obstacles. Unbelief leaves God out of the equation and never acts or stands firm on the truth of God's Word."-Krista Williams

Ouch...that one stepped harder on my toes and putting these two thoughts together I really felt like there was a huge finger pointing right at me. 

Are their areas of your life that you are only seeing giants and impossibilities? Do the obstacles seem bigger than you are? I hear you. I find myself saying a lot recently, concerning one thing in particular that "I just don't understand how it's going to happen."

Can I just tell you that I am doubting in that area and FORGETTING to stand firm on the truth of God's word! Philippians 4:13 tells me that "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." IF God wants this situation to happen then He will make it happen. If it doesn't happen then that means that God does not want that particular thing for me in this season of my life. It does not mean that He doesn't care or He did not answer my prayer. 

It means that His will is greater than my wants!

I want to be like like the father in Mark whose son was possessed by an impure spirit who said "I do believe; Lord, help me overcome my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)

There is a song by FFH  called "Daniel" that started going through my head this morning and it says:

I want to be like Daniel in the Lion's den

Waiting for God's love to save him

I wanna be, I wanna be,

I want to be like Moses when he raised his hands

And all the winds and seas obeyed him

I wanna be, I wanna be

When  I need to drink from that living cup

When I need to fight but I give up

When I need to feel God more and more

I'm reminded of the ones who were here before

I don't know about you, but I want to be like Daniel who was facing impossible odds, but trusted God anyway. I want to be like Moses who was also facing impossible odds but trusted God despite impossible odds. I believe I am more like Jonah who was stubborn and headstrong, running from God first, before trusting that God's way is in fact the right way, and then obeying and trusting God.

What obstacles are you facing today? What giants are standing in your way? Who do you want to be? One who lets unbelief and giants hurl you into the pit of despair? Or one who acknowledges that those giants and struggles are big and real, but my God is BIGGER?

There are many things we will never understand this side of heaven, but can I encourage you that if you trust in the one true God, He will never leave you nor forsake you. He will provide all you need, not all you want. His ways are not our ways.

Weeds

For Mother's Day this year I gave my mother-in-law a coupon for 3 hours of our time to do whatever she needed done around her house. I was thinking cleaning the inside of the house or organizing or something like that. Never did I dream that she would ask me to help with weeding her flower gardens. I was like are you sure? You sure you don't want me to help clean out your closet or SOMETHING?! Anything other than pull the weeds? But, she wanted help with her weeds. So, the kids and I went and spent time helping her weed her flower gardens. When we left her house I was exhausted, but felt I had done a pretty good job.

When I pulled into my driveway I was STUNNED. When did I get weeds in MY flower garden?? How did I not notice?! I swear they must have all grown in while I was at my mother-in-laws house! However, since I know that is impossible, I will say that it must have happened and I was so busy with the other things going on in my life that I never noticed until I took the time out to weed someone else's garden. So of course it's been eating at me to get out there and take care of my weeds.

Sin is like that too. It roots in and festers before we ever notice that it's there...and if we are not careful it will start choking out the life in us. It starts out as one little weed or one little sin, but before you know it there are so many weeds you don't know where it started or where you should begin to pull them out.

One thing I noticed as I started pulling my weeds is that one weed  looked pretty innocent...but the longer I examined it and tried to find the root, I realized it had multiple roots...6 in fact. Sin is like this too. It starts out as one little sin...then before you know it, it has taken over different parts of your life. You find it hard to realize where it started and where and when it is going to end. I would encourage you to find the roots and start there. You may not even realize you are in sin...until you start pointing out someone else's...and then you hear that little voice saying what about that little lie you told? Or when you yelled at your kids, or spouse or parents? What about when you sat there gossiping? Or what about what you were just looking at on the computer? Or the way you looked at your co-worker? Or the bitterness you are holding onto because things have not turned out how you thought they should? Or when you...???

Some roots are so deep that you need extra help getting them out. I found that there were some roots that I had to take the spade after, and even then it was difficult to get it out. Some sins are so deep that we need to spend time in prayer, trying to figure out where it came from. We may need to go apologize to someone or confess what we have done.

I want to be like David who said "Create in my a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me (Psalm 51:10)."

1 John 1:9 says, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."

What weeds are growing in your garden?

What do you need to take time to clean out today?

Get rid of it

A move is a perfect time to get de-clutter, simplify and get rid of stuff. Knowing we were going to be moving again, the last year in Greece we gave away a lot of clothes, books, and toys. I thought I had done a good job of getting rid of stuff.

Until we got in our new house.

Once we got in our house we unloaded the suitcases we had brought with us and our airshipment. I set to organizing right away, because that is what I do. I soar in an organized space, but I flounder and flop in clutter. I just can't handle it. Then we got our storage stuff....what?! What is all this stuff?! I did not realize we had so much stuff. So, I set about trying to organizing that too, again, because that is what I do. The next day we got our sea shipment.

I was drowning in clutter and disorganized chaos.

We have never had such an unorganized move. It was not even our fault. When the movers in Greece (6 of them) packed out our stuff, Matt couldn't keep an eye on all of them (for those doing math, it was one Matt and 6 movers and 8 separate areas that they were packing up.) So, when we got our stuff, one box would have homeschool stuff, but was labeled toys, so it ended up upstairs instead of downstairs. Another box was labeled dining room, but somehow ended up upstairs. Some boxes had toys from Kayla's room, toys from Elijah's room and some homeschool stuff!!! It was a mess.

I don't understand the thinking process that went behind the boxes. When the movers unpack stuff they literally just take everything out of the box and sit it on the floor. Which I prefer. That way I don't have to get rid of the boxes and I can see what is what. As I was sorting stuff I was sitting it near the stairs...top or bottom depending on which direction the item needed to go. I told the kids not to walk up or down the stairs empty handed, to carry something in the direction it needed to go. I carried books up and down the stairs for 4 solid days!!! Everything ached. My arms and hands still ache (I am not exaggerating).

As I was sitting on my homeschool room floor trying to get everything organized, I snapped. Why did we have so much stuff?? I had been cleaning it out every.single.year...there should not be this much clutter!!

Why was I holding onto stuff that we NEVER used?! What was the point of that? Did I really think if I had not used it in 5 YEARS I was suddenly going to use it now?! Um, no. That was the final straw. In the last 5 years we have lived in 3 different houses/countries...and I had packed and unpacked this stuff enough. I realized I needed to quit holding onto this stuff that I never used! It was not bringing me joy, it was causing a lot of frustration as I was trying to organize it and I did not have enough space for it all. As I was cleaning this stuff out (at least a hundred books/games/puzzles) I wondered what else I was holding onto that I did not need.

Stress.

Depression.

Feelings of being overwhelmed.

Aggravation.

Annoyance.

Bitterness.

Wondering what we had gotten ourselves into.

I could go on, but I will not because you get the point. What about you? What are you holding onto that you need to get rid of? Do you have clothes in your closet that you haven't worn in 10 years? I think you can get rid of them. Shoes you never wear? Get rid of it. Knicknacks that you are tired of dusting around, that you don not know what to do with them? Get rid of it? Jealousy over something? Get rid of it. Anger at someone that you have not let got of? Get rid of it! Bitterness that your life has turned out how you wanted it?? I get it!! Get rid of it!!!!!!!!!!! Did you know that holding onto these things can actually make you sick??? Did you know that their is an actual disorder for prolonged bitterness?? It's called PTED (posttraumatic embitterment disorder). People actually experience symptoms of anxiety, depression and rage from this disorder. Is that bitterness you are holding onto worth the way it is making you feel? Is that anger worth it? Are you finding joy in the clutter around you?! If not, get rid of it!!! You will feel so much better, mentally and physically.

I love this verse:

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you (Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV)."

Life is so incredibly short you all. So incredibly short. Get rid of the things in your home that are not bringing you joy. Get rid of the things in your life that are bringing you down. Get rid of the people that are not healthy for you. Clean out the clutter and reclaim your life, find joy in the everyday moments, make them count, because you do not get a chance to do life over. Focus on the people and things that do matter and let go of the things that do not. You will be so much happier and healthier if you do.

House and Job Update

It has been a while since I have updated the blog. One of my sweet friends reached out to me and thought maybe it was a comment she had made that prevented me from doing any more posts. So, rest assured, it is not you that has prevented me from writing, we have just been slammed with life. In addition to keeping up with the kids school work, I was keeping up with my two classes, we were house hunting, then having meetings about the house, traveling back and forth from Concord to Charlotte and waiting to hear on Matt's job situation. Since the last time I have written, Kayla has gotten braces, we accepted our air shipment, we put over 500 miles on our van just for house hunting, over 2000 miles in traveling back and forth from here to TN and other things we have done around town,  Elijah had four teeth pulled and goes back this morning for an evaluation to see if he will need more teeth pulled or if they are going to put spacers in where he had the last teeth pulled, plus he was sick last week.
We also put an offer in on a new house, that was accepted and we are moving ahead with closing. While this is a very good thing, we had to compromise on a lot of what we wanted, so in some ways it's really bittersweet. Every single day some new obstacle has popped up over the last few months, I wish I could say this is an exaggeration, but it is not. I am not in any way trying to complain, I am simply laying out a few details, I will spare you most of them so that it doesn't seem like I am complaining.
Matt took an addition month off of work in the hopes to get a good job and just have the job situation settled before having to go back to work. On Thursday we found out he did not get the job we were hoping for. Today he goes back to work, but in a position they have determined they will put him in and it is a demotion. So, today is also bittersweet. We had a lot of hopes and dreams when we moved back from Greece and quite frankly none of them are coming to fruition.
I had two more classes that were supposed to start today, but since we will be moving into our house soon and there is so much to do, I dropped the two classes. I got burned here as well, but will move on. I hope to pick them back up in September.
So, today, Matt goes back to work after 7 weeks off. As I mentioned a moment ago, this is bittersweet. We are very thankful that he has a job. I am thankful that he is going back to work today as this is the first step of us getting back to a "normal" schedule. The kids and I came back to NC 10 weeks ago today, which is how long we have  been in transition (so far!). Matt came back 7 weeks ago. This week will be hard on us, especially Elijah as we have gotten used to Matt being around all the time.
Next Wednesday we are set to close on our house (pray everything goes smoothly). We will attempt to start painting the house on Wednesday. On Friday we will get our storage shipment and the following Monday we get our air shipment. We are going to be very busy trying to get everything settled...and that Thursday Elijah will turn 11!!! My class that I am still in (and it is kicking my tail!!!) ends April 8th. Hoping to finish strong, but would appreciate prayers through all of these chaotic events!
We have had a lot of questions as to where we are going to go to church, so I will say here we have not made any solid decisions. We are not going to burn a bunch of bridges. We have literally been taking it one day at a time, which is all we can do. Right now we are living in my father-in-laws house and we are attending his church, it's just easier and we of course love the church and the people.  Life has been completely overwhelming and still is. We will continue to make the decisions as we have to, but I refuse to plan to far ahead, I simply can't. I have to focus on today and the tasks that need to be done in this day!
One final note, as a reminder to our family and friends...I had said before once we get settled we were not traveling for 6 months to a year...this still holds true. If you are not in the immediate area we are not making any plans to travel. We need time to settle and heal. We are weary, battered and bruised. We want to see you all and would love to have you come see us!!! Thank you for understanding this.
We are looking forward to getting our suitcases unpacked and we are thankful that we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. We are looking forward to being settled, hopefully for a really good, LONG time!!!
As you think of us, continue to pray for us. I know the Lord has great plans for us and we are just waiting to see the good that will come out of all of this.
"For I know the plans I have for you, " declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

Not the bug :)

Today is Friday!!! Hallelujah! It has been a long week, month, year!!! However, today I am rejoicing. Why? Because it is Friday. Here are a few things I LOVE about this particular Friday:

I have had hugs and kisses from my loved ones...I am LOVED!

My loved ones are all healthy.....we are blessed!!!!

It is Friday!!!....that mean's it's the weekend!

We built a bonfire....we are blessed!

WE roasted hotdogs.....we had food to eat.....we are blessed!

The hotdogs were super yummy...........we are blessed :)!!!!

WE made smores......we are blessed :)

I had Ghiradelli Carmel chocolates that I used to make S'mores.....I am doubly blessed!!!!

Don't worry, we had the stuff for regular S'mores as well :)!!! Still blessed!!!

Matt and I sat around the bonfire talking for at least an hour....quality time...I am blessed!!!

Not every day is going to be great and sunshine and roses. The hard days make us appreciate the good days even more. So after a month or so of hard days I am incredibly thankful for this good day. I am thankful for PERSPECTIVE. I know in the scheme of things these hard days are a mere blip. I know that EVENTUALLY we will know which job Matt is going to get in Charlotte and then we will FINALLY be able to get in a routine. But, today, that doesn't matter. At least he will have a job and eventually we will get our routines back.

I hope you all have a FABULOUS FRIDAY AND AN AMAZING WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you all for your encouragement and love.

I am blessed beyond measure to have friends like YOU in my life!!

Sometimes you are the bug

This morning as I came out to the kitchen to start the coffee pot, there was a stink bug on the floor. I looked right at him and told him I wasn't messing with him. I did not want to stink the place up with all his poisonous, stinky fumes. Yesterday, I was that bug. I had a nasty attitude and if anyone had bothered to mess with me I would have been putting those stinky poisonous fumes all over the place. I don't want to make excuses, so I won't. Life is very difficult right now and I have a lot of things hitting me all at once, and I was just completely overwhelmed by life. I didn't want to be the bug. I sat down, had a good cry and tried to get all those emotions out, but it just wasn't enough. I love what Lysa TerKeurst has to say about our emotions, "I can face things that are out of my control and not act out of control." Ouch. Can I really?! I know I can, I know it is a choice, but in the heat of the moment, do I let me emotions control me? Or do I have control over my emotions. Sigh. Yesterday, my emotions definitely had the control and I acted out of control. Not only with my words, but also my eating. I won't mention what I ate or how much, but let's just say it wasn't pretty. I am not going to dwell here, but today are you the bug? Are you stuck in a seemingly impossible situation and you can't see the way out? You are tired and weary of the situation and just about everything else? Lysa has a few more words of wisdom, that speaks to my heart, and hopefully to yours as well "God does work for the good... in all things... every single thing... even our most raw and seemingly impossible things... but we must know it even when we don't feel it and let God have His way."

Reality

Last Thursday morning Matt took an additional month off of work so we could figure things out about our future and to wait on the job he had applied for. That afternoon he was notified that he did not get the job. We were devastated. All our dreams and plans were completely crushed. It would have been a promotion and a great location, closer to my family. A week later I would like to tell you that we are fine and have accepted this, but I can't. We are still in limbo, trying to make decisions and it is so incredibly hard.

 

How do you let go of a dream that was so incredible to accept a reality that looks less than good?

 

I think it starts to get easier as you realize that God has you exactly where He wants you to be. We are completely dependent upon Him for our next move. Matt had also applied for a job here in Charlotte that would be a lateral move, but we are still waiting to hear if he will get it. If not, it still looks like we will end up in Charlotte, at the demoted job and wherever they want him to be in the office. So, for those of you who were praying that we would land back in Charlotte, I want to stab you with my pencil. However, I won't, because no matter what I know we will end up exactly where God wants us to be.

So, here is what we do know:

God is still on the throne and this did not take Him by surprise.

We will be making a fresh start here, most likely a different part of Charlotte.

We head back to our retreat in TN late Monday, and will be there until next week, we come back so Kayla can get braces on March 1. This is where are plans end...we can't plan beyond this not knowing what is going to happen with Matt's job.

We are still waiting to hear from the dentist when Elijah will have his 4 teeth extracted.

Matt's start back to work date is set for March 21st, but once we hear which job he will end up in we will probably change that and go back earlier.

We are ready to be settled and not popping back and forth from state to state.

We are ready to be living in our own place without having to pull clothes out of the suitcase every day.

We are trying to create a new dream and be excited about what is going on with us.

It's hard.

We will survive this disappointment.

I am swamped in school work which is why I have not updated the blog recently.

We are still happy to be back in the states and the kids are enjoying playing outside.

This planner is learning even more to wait on the Lord and not make as many plans.

We thought we would be closer to settled by now.

I recently won a book and I am looking forward to that arriving in the mail.

God is good all the time, all the time God is good.

 

Keep praying for us, pray that Matt gets the lateral job, pray that I get to feeling better as I have major sinus pressure and don't feel good. Pray that we are able to get settled soon as the kids are still struggling with not being settled. You all are awesome and I thank God that you are a part of our lives (even those who prayed us back to Charlotte!!).

Are you ready?

What do you do when you are preparing for a big event? If you are like most ladies you get your hair and nails done, shop for a new dress and put your best effort into your look. Most men take a shower and call it good. No seriously, depending on the man, they might get a haircut, get their nails done and shop for new clothes too. They also want to put their best foot forward.

Did you know that another BIG event is coming? It might not be today, tomorrow or even next week, but it IS coming. Christ will return someday. Are you ready? I am channeling my inner excited Elsa voice when I am asking if you are ready. If you don't know what I am talking about click on Elsa's name and watch the super short video clip. In it she asks if they are ready and then she does some beautiful things with ice. I am asking are you ready because the most beautiful thing is coming...can you imagine walking through those pearly gates and meeting our Maker??

Now, you may or may not be a Christian, but regardless, He is coming again and we need to be ready. If you are a Christian, are you ready? Are you living each and every day in a way that will bring glory to HIM? Are you being a good Christian witness?

I can hear some of you say, “I don’t believe in that.” Well, that is fine too, because it is a choice for each and every one of us to make. I choose to believe and I choose Christ. Now, if I am right, then I will spend eternity in heaven with my heavenly Father and my Christian family and friends. If I am wrong? Well, then I will still have spent my life trying to do my best, to be good and do the right thing, and to treat others like I would want to be treated. I will live my life in such a way that I don’t have regrets. Do I get it right all the time? Of course not, I may be a Christian, but that doesn’t make me perfect. I am human and I do and will continue to make mistakes and not always choose the right choice.

Now, what if you are right and there is not a God and heaven? Well you can continue to live your life exactly as you please while you are on earth and die knowing you lived your life exactly as you wanted to live. Again, it’s your choice. But, what if you are wrong? What is there is a God and a place called Heaven? Prepare to meet your maker and spend eternity burning in hell. Will you have regrets? Will you have really lived your life just the way that you wanted to live it?

This may sound harsh, but I want my friends and family in heaven with me, not burning in Hell. So, if you have never heard of Jesus Christ, He is real and He desires a relationship with you.  How do you learn more about Him? By reading the Bible and asking questions about what you are reading. Don’t take my word for it, read it for yourself and draw your own conclusions.

I know Christians have gotten a lot of bad press, mostly for being too legalistic. Our God is a God of details, but He is not legalistic, nor do I believe He wants us to be. (I am speaking to myself here too, I know I used to be way to legalistic and have mellowed a bit over the years) He is the judge, not us. When we make issues out of non-issues we are not representing Him well.

Some people think that they need to get their life cleaned up before they come to Him. However, Jesus says to come as you are. He is not looking for perfection, He is looking for a willing heart. You can repent of your past mistakes and failures, He is a God of forgiveness and will wash your sins away, making you clean as the freshly fallen snow. Your slate will be clean when you ask Him for forgiveness and you can truly start over and be free. Again, don't take my word for it, read your Bible to find the answers for yourself.

 If you died tomorrow, would you have regrets? (And I hear, "no because I will be dead!") Seriously, if today was your last day on earth, would you have regrets? Would you look back and wish you had done things differently? Today is the day to make those changes so that you will not have regrets. As long as you have breath it's not to late. If you are reflecting on your life and not happy with the choices you have made, make a change today! Now I am thinking of Michael Jackson and his song "Man in the Mirror." As you look in the mirror what changes can you/should you be making?? It has to start with YOU, no one can do it for you!!!!! "I'm gonna make a change...it's going to feel real good...gotta make that change today..."-Michael Jackson...If you don't know the song click on the link and lesson, it really is a good message.

Psalm 51:10 "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

John 8:32 "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Acts 2:38 Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

While you are waiting

I don’t know about you, but I hate waiting. Are you, like me in the middle of a waiting season? It seems like we are ALWAYS waiting on something, whether big or small. We had thought for sure that we would know whether or not Matt was getting the job he applied for back in December. However, here we are, pretty much at the end of January, with Matt flying in on Saturday and we still have not heard about the job! I am sure there are a lot of contributing factors that have delayed this decision, Christmas, New Year’s, Martin Luther King, Jr. day, and then the snow storm of the decade hits and DC is snowed under.

I have good days and bad days with waiting. On the good days I am keeping my eyes on the Lord, completely trusting Him.

On the bad days I am more focused on the situation and the not knowing. I let worry and doubt creep in.

I am currently reading “teacher” The Henrietta Mears Story by Marcus Brotherton and it is really good. I read this quote yesterday:

“Will you stop looking at your problems and wringing your hands in despair? Faith and despair cannot remain in the same heart. Take your choice; trust God or worry. You cannot really do both.” –Henrietta Mears

Are you in a season of waiting? Are you waiting on a new job to come open? Waiting on your house to sell? Waiting on that new baby? Waiting on that pathology report? Waiting on your deployed spouse to come home? Waiting on orders for your next move? Waiting on your child to grow up? Waiting on a job promotion? Waiting on someone to recognize all your good work? Are you waiting on healing? Waiting on the snow to melt? What are you waiting on? How are you handling the wait? I have 10 tips for you while you are waiting, they are from Lysa Terkeurst’s book (and Bible Study) Walk inFaith and come from the following verses:

Psalm 27:13-14 “I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord.”

Psalm 33:20 “We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield.”

Psalm 40:1 “I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.”

Psalm 130:5 “I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.”

1)      Do not lose confidence in God’s goodness

2)      Be strong

3)      Do not lose hope

4)      Let God be your shield and help

5)      BE PATIENT (emphasis mine!)

6)      Continue to cry out to God

7)      Cling to His word

8)      Watch for His answers

9)      Trust in His unfailing love

10)  Rejoice in His redemption

He hears our prayers and He knows the desires of our heart. One of my devotionals this morning said that God sometimes answers in ways that surprise us.

“This reminds us that He is not bound by our expectations, and we can’t predict what He will choose to do. While we wait, focusing on who He is rather than what we think He should do will helps us find joy and satisfaction in our relationship with Him.”-Jennifer Benson Schuldt

“If you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, look for it like silver and search as hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.”

Proverbs 2:3-6

Waiting is not easy. I don’t know anyone who LIKES to wait. However, it is a part of life. We can’t control how long we have to wait and we can’t hurry that decision up, but we can choose HOW we are going to wait. Are we going to continue to be impatient? Or are we going to wait in our own strength? Or, are we going to let go and let God, in His amazing strength? Keep looking up, it makes it easier to wait if we wait on the Lord and look to Him, rather than focusing on our circumstances.

Hair!

So for those of you following my hair debate on Facebook yesterday, here are the results. I decided to go to Wal-mart and buy color in a bottle! I have never colored my whole head, I have only had highlights and lowlights, so this was a huge step for me. I was standing in the aisle trying to make a decision. I asked the kids their opinion and E said "Clear!" He did not want me to change it at all, no surprise there. K was like, "Most of these are permanent." Hmm, let's avoid those!! I finally decided to do Clairol Natural Instincts, a light brown color. The top pictures are before pictures and then after pictures. When the kids saw it E said it didn't look much different (it doesn't) and K said it looks good, there is less blond in it, which is true. I have never colored my own hair, so that was another HUGE step for me. For $7 I think it looks fine. It's funny because first reaction is I think I liked it better before I started. I will know better after I really wash it the first time. I probably could have left the color on a little bit longer too and I am thankful for one of my friends advice as she told me it would come out a bit darker than you think, which it did, I was going for light and it looks darker. I think it would have looked better if I had had help, but hey, whatever I DID IT MYSELF :)!!!!!!!

 What do you all think??? Honest opinions here :)

Below this comment starts the AFTER pictures. I tried to get the same angle's as the previous pictures.

Be Quiet

Do you ever find yourself saying things that you know you shouldn’t say? No matter how hard you try the words just spill forth? I have that problem when I am overtired…I tend to have run of the mouth syndrome. I find myself spilling out all these things that don’t matter and this is when I am most likely to say something negative about someone. Or just grumble about everything! I can hear myself saying these things, but feeling powerless to stop them. Usually it is Matt who hears all my run of the mouth tendencies, but sometimes I am on the phone when I do it and then I wind up feeling stupid for what I say. I sit there thinking that was completely pointless and what must this person be thinking of me?! I was lying in bed the other night thinking about the verse that says “Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” Psalm 141:3

When I get up in the morning and start my prayers I usually remember to pray about my tone. I don’t want it to be biting and negative, tearing the kids or anyone else down. But, I don’t actually remember to pray about my words!! I need to make this verse part of my morning prayers. I don’t want my words to negatively impact anyone and I know this directly affects my Christian witness.  Proverbs 25:11 states: “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” (NKJV)

Last night after I put the kids to bed they were laughing and talking. A while later I went in to tell them I was going to bed and K said E wouldn't stop talking. He said "I can't help it. I am so tired and I can't stop talking!" The apple doesn't fall far from this tree. So, if me and my son have run of the mouth tendencies, I imagine we are not alone.

Let’s watch our careless words. Words we say in anger or frustration will always be out there. I can remember hateful words said to me as a child…and obviously I haven’t been a child for a long time. It’s not like I want to remember those words, but they tore me down and it has stuck with me. You never know what someone else is going through. It may look like they have it all together, but if we all remember the golden rule to treat others how we want to be treated, and to build each other and stop tearing each other down, we would have a lot less regrets. Words are powerful, how will you use yours today?

Blank Slate

The fresh fallen snow reminds me of a blank slate. It is beautiful and unmarred by anything. I love how pretty it looks before anyone walks or drives on it. Each day is a blank slate too, a chance to start over. No matter what you did yesterday, today is a chance to start over, a chance to do the right thing. Yesterday’s choices don’t have to define who you are today. Maybe you yelled at your kids, your husband, your parents, the grocery store checker, the car in front of you, the car behind you…it doesn’t matter, today you get a fresh start to do it right. I keep thinking of something I said to my kids last night. It wasn’t bad but it is still something I wish I hadn’t said. Today is a new day to watch my words closer, to choose nice and good words, words that build up and not to tear down. We are only given one life to live and I want to live a life of no regrets. Today, I can start over, treat others like I want to be treated, chose to make the right choices with what I eat and whether or not I exercise, yesterday’s choices don’t matter today. Just because I made a mistake yesterday doesn’t mean I have to repeat the same mistake today or tomorrow.  Today is a day to spend my time doing the things that need to be done, not just flitting my time away. What areas of your life do you need a blank slate in? What things do you do over and over again, even though you don’t want to? “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” Romans 7:15

Today is a new day, you get a new start. Stop repeating yesterday’s mistakes and start living a new life today.

“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10

I don't know if you can see the heart in this bottom picture or not, but it reminds me that their is beauty in everything, including snow melting. Let's look for the good, the beauty in all things.

Waiting on the storm

I sat around all day today waiting on a storm that didn’t come. It was a complete and total waste of my time. And, before you start judging me, it’s not like I didn’t do things, I did, and I was super productive with my time. But I was distracted and not as focused as I could have been. Or rather I was focused on the wrong things. I have been worried about being stranded in the mountains, with the kids, BY MYSELF! I was so focused on being stuck in for the next few days I didn’t realize I could have gone out today. So, instead, I waited on the storm that never came.

Have you ever done that? We sit and stew and ponder and wonder…what if? Then we follow the rabbit trail…

And it never happens.

Yet we stewed over it for a day…

Or two…

Or a week…

Got ourselves into a real tizzy…

Yet, it never happened!

Why do we do this? Why do we waste our energy on things that they don’t need to be wasted on? Why do we worry ourselves to death on what ifs?

I have to tell you, I am completely exhausted.

 Emotionally and physically. I look at all the energy I wasted yesterday and today on the storm and what I was going to do…and yet nothing.

It’s not that it’s not coming, it just hasn’t come yet.

And truly, what am I so worried about? We have food, clothes, power, heat, a gas fireplace so even if the power goes out we will be totally fine.

I had lost my perspective. I tend to do that when I am overstressed or overtired and right now I simply am both. I was choosing to focus on what I couldn’t do, instead of what I could do. I was choosing to worry when I should have been praising God that the storm hasn’t hit! And, it’s not like I didn’t have choices this weekend, I did. We could have gone to my sister’s for the weekend, but I was worried about not being able to get back here at the end of the weekend and I want us to stay on a somewhat normal school routine. (worried, worried, worried!)

And didn’t I say we were going to retreat in the mountains for two weeks? What better way to retreat than to be stranded, LOL!

What about you? What are you focusing on? Are you focused on what you can’t do? Or what you can? Don’t lose your perspective. If you are focusing on the negatives, found the positives, they are there, in the middle of the greatest storms there is still something positive you can be focused on.

“Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” Matthew 6:27

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it’s own.” Matthew 6:34

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6

Gifted?!

We all have gifts, whether we recognize it or not. In the Christian circle they are called spiritual gifts and the Bible tells us that everyone gets them and you are to use them to bring glory to God. I can hear you now, you don't think you have any special gifts and I understand and have been there. As I have gotten older and am learning to listen to the Lord more, I am recognizing what my true gifts are. I am still trying to figure out how to utilize them to the best of my ability, to His glory. If you had asked me when I was younger what my gifts are I would have said, "Well, I love little kids so I must be gifted with kids." A few years later I would have told you that I was gifted to teach little kids. As I look back and reflect on my life so far I would still say I am gifted with kids and I love to be around them. Some days I would not say I am a gifted teacher, but I am teaching my children so I need to work harder at this task that has been set before me! I would also say that I love to encourage people and have been told that I am gifted with encouragement. I have always loved sending people encouraging notes in the mail, and if this is my gift, I am currently failing at it as I don't do that anymore. Obviously there are other ways to encourage people and I like to think that I am doing that, but I would still say I am not utilizing it as well as I could be.  One other thing that I really enjoy doing and makes me happy is serving and helping other people. I always offer to help when I know someone needs help and sometimes I am taken up on that and other times I am not. But, I truly enjoy helping and it makes me so happy to be able to do so.

One thing has recently pushed me out of my comfort zone and I am currently exploring and praying about, is if I am a gifted writer. I have NEVER thought that I was and I still don't, but I have been told in the last 3 weeks at least 5 times by 5 different people that I am. I am not counting Matt in this as he's told me that since I have started this blog, but of course I didn't believe him as I thought he was only trying to be encouraging. I don't handle compliments well and don't particularly know how to respond. One of my current professors was one of the people who have told me that I was gifted with writing. So, since I have been told this so frequently recently I am wondering why and what I should do about it. I really love writing this blog, even when I feel that I don't have anything to say. I am not really interested in writing the great American novel...I still don't feel like I have much to say. I would love to be able to make a difference in people's lives. I look at the ladies in Proverbs 31 Ministries and last semester I thought it would be great to be on staff with them and be able to encourage people like they do...but I let that thought slip away. I also look at people like Beth Moore and Karen Kingsbury and what a difference they are making in people's lives and again I would love to be able to do that, I just don't know how and through what medium. I am not a speaker and I don't want to be famous, that's not what I am saying. I truly would love to make an impact on people's lives, serving as Christ would have me serve, for HIS glory, not mine.

So, going back to what I started with, all of us are gifted in some way, Christian or not. I have some friends who I look at and they are great with hospitality and gifts of service and if they ever got turned on to the Lord I can see the great things they could do for Him. What are your gifts?? And don't tell me that you don't have any because YOU DO! Are you using them for His glory or your own glory?? Are you using them at all? I don't know if they are like other things where if you don't use them they go away, but what if they are?? What a waste it would be if you were essentially throwing them away. If you are not sure of your gifts start analyzing what you are good at and what you love doing. Then look for ways that you can use those gifts!! Go out and do big things for God!

Back to America

Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy! We are back in the states and have no plans to leave again anytime soon or possibly ever (not going to say never!).

Yesterday was rough but we made it back to the states safely, which I am very thankful for. We had a lot of turbulence on our flights and even with Dramamine I felt sick, but thankfully didn't get sick. Jetlag is no joke and I didn't sleep well last night. I have been awake since three am, but I am so thankful to be back in the states. When we flew into D.C. the passport control guy said "Welcome Home." Let me tell you, in the middle of traveling and after being so homesick and miserable there are no greater words "Welcome Home." If you see me in the next few weeks feel free to say it often and with enthusiasm!

Some things I am excited or at least happy about in the last 19 hours:

All our luggage arrived and in one piece!

The bathroom doesn't smell like a sewer!

We can flush toilet paper!!

We can flush the toilet while someone is in the shower and it is not going to scald them and then immediately freeze them!

I didn't hear my neighbors' kids running up and down the stairs half the night.

Kayla and I went to Target this morning!

Everyone followed the traffic laws, we drove my mini-van and we had no trouble with parking and there was very little traffic!

We bought clothes, boots and groceries all in one place!
We flushed toilet paper at Target too!

The bathrooms in Target were super clean!

Everyone treated us nicely and welcomed us with smiles!

We went to the bank and everything was super efficient and again, we were greeted with smiles and how are you's...and thank you and have a great day!

Kayla picked Chick-fil-a for lunch and it was super yummy!

We were out all morning and I didn't feel like I needed to shower when I got home because we didn't smell like exhaust, cigarette smoke or Greek food.

I am doing a load of laundry and all our dark clothes fit in one load!
I didn't have to drain the washing machine!
I didn't have to drain the dryer!

My kids have been SO HAPPY TODAY!!!! LOTS of laughter!!!

Kayla and I had a girls morning and she kept saying how happy she was to be back in the states! She is literally giddy with excitement.

Everything we have attempted to do today has been easy and fun, even with 4 hours of sleep!

I know these next few weeks are not going to be all rosy and happy but we are off to a great start. The only dimmer on our excitement is that Matt is not with us and we don't yet know our final destination, but this is a short time to be away from Matt and I trust God with our future!

Look for the tiny blessings in your day and chose to focus on them, instead of the things that frustrate and overwhelm you!