Not the bug :)

Today is Friday!!! Hallelujah! It has been a long week, month, year!!! However, today I am rejoicing. Why? Because it is Friday. Here are a few things I LOVE about this particular Friday:

I have had hugs and kisses from my loved ones...I am LOVED!

My loved ones are all healthy.....we are blessed!!!!

It is Friday!!!....that mean's it's the weekend!

We built a bonfire....we are blessed!

WE roasted hotdogs.....we had food to eat.....we are blessed!

The hotdogs were super yummy...........we are blessed :)!!!!

WE made smores......we are blessed :)

I had Ghiradelli Carmel chocolates that I used to make S'mores.....I am doubly blessed!!!!

Don't worry, we had the stuff for regular S'mores as well :)!!! Still blessed!!!

Matt and I sat around the bonfire talking for at least an hour....quality time...I am blessed!!!

Not every day is going to be great and sunshine and roses. The hard days make us appreciate the good days even more. So after a month or so of hard days I am incredibly thankful for this good day. I am thankful for PERSPECTIVE. I know in the scheme of things these hard days are a mere blip. I know that EVENTUALLY we will know which job Matt is going to get in Charlotte and then we will FINALLY be able to get in a routine. But, today, that doesn't matter. At least he will have a job and eventually we will get our routines back.

I hope you all have a FABULOUS FRIDAY AND AN AMAZING WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you all for your encouragement and love.

I am blessed beyond measure to have friends like YOU in my life!!

Sometimes you are the bug

This morning as I came out to the kitchen to start the coffee pot, there was a stink bug on the floor. I looked right at him and told him I wasn't messing with him. I did not want to stink the place up with all his poisonous, stinky fumes. Yesterday, I was that bug. I had a nasty attitude and if anyone had bothered to mess with me I would have been putting those stinky poisonous fumes all over the place. I don't want to make excuses, so I won't. Life is very difficult right now and I have a lot of things hitting me all at once, and I was just completely overwhelmed by life. I didn't want to be the bug. I sat down, had a good cry and tried to get all those emotions out, but it just wasn't enough. I love what Lysa TerKeurst has to say about our emotions, "I can face things that are out of my control and not act out of control." Ouch. Can I really?! I know I can, I know it is a choice, but in the heat of the moment, do I let me emotions control me? Or do I have control over my emotions. Sigh. Yesterday, my emotions definitely had the control and I acted out of control. Not only with my words, but also my eating. I won't mention what I ate or how much, but let's just say it wasn't pretty. I am not going to dwell here, but today are you the bug? Are you stuck in a seemingly impossible situation and you can't see the way out? You are tired and weary of the situation and just about everything else? Lysa has a few more words of wisdom, that speaks to my heart, and hopefully to yours as well "God does work for the good... in all things... every single thing... even our most raw and seemingly impossible things... but we must know it even when we don't feel it and let God have His way."

Reality

Last Thursday morning Matt took an additional month off of work so we could figure things out about our future and to wait on the job he had applied for. That afternoon he was notified that he did not get the job. We were devastated. All our dreams and plans were completely crushed. It would have been a promotion and a great location, closer to my family. A week later I would like to tell you that we are fine and have accepted this, but I can't. We are still in limbo, trying to make decisions and it is so incredibly hard.

 

How do you let go of a dream that was so incredible to accept a reality that looks less than good?

 

I think it starts to get easier as you realize that God has you exactly where He wants you to be. We are completely dependent upon Him for our next move. Matt had also applied for a job here in Charlotte that would be a lateral move, but we are still waiting to hear if he will get it. If not, it still looks like we will end up in Charlotte, at the demoted job and wherever they want him to be in the office. So, for those of you who were praying that we would land back in Charlotte, I want to stab you with my pencil. However, I won't, because no matter what I know we will end up exactly where God wants us to be.

So, here is what we do know:

God is still on the throne and this did not take Him by surprise.

We will be making a fresh start here, most likely a different part of Charlotte.

We head back to our retreat in TN late Monday, and will be there until next week, we come back so Kayla can get braces on March 1. This is where are plans end...we can't plan beyond this not knowing what is going to happen with Matt's job.

We are still waiting to hear from the dentist when Elijah will have his 4 teeth extracted.

Matt's start back to work date is set for March 21st, but once we hear which job he will end up in we will probably change that and go back earlier.

We are ready to be settled and not popping back and forth from state to state.

We are ready to be living in our own place without having to pull clothes out of the suitcase every day.

We are trying to create a new dream and be excited about what is going on with us.

It's hard.

We will survive this disappointment.

I am swamped in school work which is why I have not updated the blog recently.

We are still happy to be back in the states and the kids are enjoying playing outside.

This planner is learning even more to wait on the Lord and not make as many plans.

We thought we would be closer to settled by now.

I recently won a book and I am looking forward to that arriving in the mail.

God is good all the time, all the time God is good.

 

Keep praying for us, pray that Matt gets the lateral job, pray that I get to feeling better as I have major sinus pressure and don't feel good. Pray that we are able to get settled soon as the kids are still struggling with not being settled. You all are awesome and I thank God that you are a part of our lives (even those who prayed us back to Charlotte!!).

Are you ready?

What do you do when you are preparing for a big event? If you are like most ladies you get your hair and nails done, shop for a new dress and put your best effort into your look. Most men take a shower and call it good. No seriously, depending on the man, they might get a haircut, get their nails done and shop for new clothes too. They also want to put their best foot forward.

Did you know that another BIG event is coming? It might not be today, tomorrow or even next week, but it IS coming. Christ will return someday. Are you ready? I am channeling my inner excited Elsa voice when I am asking if you are ready. If you don't know what I am talking about click on Elsa's name and watch the super short video clip. In it she asks if they are ready and then she does some beautiful things with ice. I am asking are you ready because the most beautiful thing is coming...can you imagine walking through those pearly gates and meeting our Maker??

Now, you may or may not be a Christian, but regardless, He is coming again and we need to be ready. If you are a Christian, are you ready? Are you living each and every day in a way that will bring glory to HIM? Are you being a good Christian witness?

I can hear some of you say, “I don’t believe in that.” Well, that is fine too, because it is a choice for each and every one of us to make. I choose to believe and I choose Christ. Now, if I am right, then I will spend eternity in heaven with my heavenly Father and my Christian family and friends. If I am wrong? Well, then I will still have spent my life trying to do my best, to be good and do the right thing, and to treat others like I would want to be treated. I will live my life in such a way that I don’t have regrets. Do I get it right all the time? Of course not, I may be a Christian, but that doesn’t make me perfect. I am human and I do and will continue to make mistakes and not always choose the right choice.

Now, what if you are right and there is not a God and heaven? Well you can continue to live your life exactly as you please while you are on earth and die knowing you lived your life exactly as you wanted to live. Again, it’s your choice. But, what if you are wrong? What is there is a God and a place called Heaven? Prepare to meet your maker and spend eternity burning in hell. Will you have regrets? Will you have really lived your life just the way that you wanted to live it?

This may sound harsh, but I want my friends and family in heaven with me, not burning in Hell. So, if you have never heard of Jesus Christ, He is real and He desires a relationship with you.  How do you learn more about Him? By reading the Bible and asking questions about what you are reading. Don’t take my word for it, read it for yourself and draw your own conclusions.

I know Christians have gotten a lot of bad press, mostly for being too legalistic. Our God is a God of details, but He is not legalistic, nor do I believe He wants us to be. (I am speaking to myself here too, I know I used to be way to legalistic and have mellowed a bit over the years) He is the judge, not us. When we make issues out of non-issues we are not representing Him well.

Some people think that they need to get their life cleaned up before they come to Him. However, Jesus says to come as you are. He is not looking for perfection, He is looking for a willing heart. You can repent of your past mistakes and failures, He is a God of forgiveness and will wash your sins away, making you clean as the freshly fallen snow. Your slate will be clean when you ask Him for forgiveness and you can truly start over and be free. Again, don't take my word for it, read your Bible to find the answers for yourself.

 If you died tomorrow, would you have regrets? (And I hear, "no because I will be dead!") Seriously, if today was your last day on earth, would you have regrets? Would you look back and wish you had done things differently? Today is the day to make those changes so that you will not have regrets. As long as you have breath it's not to late. If you are reflecting on your life and not happy with the choices you have made, make a change today! Now I am thinking of Michael Jackson and his song "Man in the Mirror." As you look in the mirror what changes can you/should you be making?? It has to start with YOU, no one can do it for you!!!!! "I'm gonna make a change...it's going to feel real good...gotta make that change today..."-Michael Jackson...If you don't know the song click on the link and lesson, it really is a good message.

Psalm 51:10 "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

John 8:32 "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Acts 2:38 Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

While you are waiting

I don’t know about you, but I hate waiting. Are you, like me in the middle of a waiting season? It seems like we are ALWAYS waiting on something, whether big or small. We had thought for sure that we would know whether or not Matt was getting the job he applied for back in December. However, here we are, pretty much at the end of January, with Matt flying in on Saturday and we still have not heard about the job! I am sure there are a lot of contributing factors that have delayed this decision, Christmas, New Year’s, Martin Luther King, Jr. day, and then the snow storm of the decade hits and DC is snowed under.

I have good days and bad days with waiting. On the good days I am keeping my eyes on the Lord, completely trusting Him.

On the bad days I am more focused on the situation and the not knowing. I let worry and doubt creep in.

I am currently reading “teacher” The Henrietta Mears Story by Marcus Brotherton and it is really good. I read this quote yesterday:

“Will you stop looking at your problems and wringing your hands in despair? Faith and despair cannot remain in the same heart. Take your choice; trust God or worry. You cannot really do both.” –Henrietta Mears

Are you in a season of waiting? Are you waiting on a new job to come open? Waiting on your house to sell? Waiting on that new baby? Waiting on that pathology report? Waiting on your deployed spouse to come home? Waiting on orders for your next move? Waiting on your child to grow up? Waiting on a job promotion? Waiting on someone to recognize all your good work? Are you waiting on healing? Waiting on the snow to melt? What are you waiting on? How are you handling the wait? I have 10 tips for you while you are waiting, they are from Lysa Terkeurst’s book (and Bible Study) Walk inFaith and come from the following verses:

Psalm 27:13-14 “I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord.”

Psalm 33:20 “We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield.”

Psalm 40:1 “I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.”

Psalm 130:5 “I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.”

1)      Do not lose confidence in God’s goodness

2)      Be strong

3)      Do not lose hope

4)      Let God be your shield and help

5)      BE PATIENT (emphasis mine!)

6)      Continue to cry out to God

7)      Cling to His word

8)      Watch for His answers

9)      Trust in His unfailing love

10)  Rejoice in His redemption

He hears our prayers and He knows the desires of our heart. One of my devotionals this morning said that God sometimes answers in ways that surprise us.

“This reminds us that He is not bound by our expectations, and we can’t predict what He will choose to do. While we wait, focusing on who He is rather than what we think He should do will helps us find joy and satisfaction in our relationship with Him.”-Jennifer Benson Schuldt

“If you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, look for it like silver and search as hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.”

Proverbs 2:3-6

Waiting is not easy. I don’t know anyone who LIKES to wait. However, it is a part of life. We can’t control how long we have to wait and we can’t hurry that decision up, but we can choose HOW we are going to wait. Are we going to continue to be impatient? Or are we going to wait in our own strength? Or, are we going to let go and let God, in His amazing strength? Keep looking up, it makes it easier to wait if we wait on the Lord and look to Him, rather than focusing on our circumstances.

Hair!

So for those of you following my hair debate on Facebook yesterday, here are the results. I decided to go to Wal-mart and buy color in a bottle! I have never colored my whole head, I have only had highlights and lowlights, so this was a huge step for me. I was standing in the aisle trying to make a decision. I asked the kids their opinion and E said "Clear!" He did not want me to change it at all, no surprise there. K was like, "Most of these are permanent." Hmm, let's avoid those!! I finally decided to do Clairol Natural Instincts, a light brown color. The top pictures are before pictures and then after pictures. When the kids saw it E said it didn't look much different (it doesn't) and K said it looks good, there is less blond in it, which is true. I have never colored my own hair, so that was another HUGE step for me. For $7 I think it looks fine. It's funny because first reaction is I think I liked it better before I started. I will know better after I really wash it the first time. I probably could have left the color on a little bit longer too and I am thankful for one of my friends advice as she told me it would come out a bit darker than you think, which it did, I was going for light and it looks darker. I think it would have looked better if I had had help, but hey, whatever I DID IT MYSELF :)!!!!!!!

 What do you all think??? Honest opinions here :)

Below this comment starts the AFTER pictures. I tried to get the same angle's as the previous pictures.

Be Quiet

Do you ever find yourself saying things that you know you shouldn’t say? No matter how hard you try the words just spill forth? I have that problem when I am overtired…I tend to have run of the mouth syndrome. I find myself spilling out all these things that don’t matter and this is when I am most likely to say something negative about someone. Or just grumble about everything! I can hear myself saying these things, but feeling powerless to stop them. Usually it is Matt who hears all my run of the mouth tendencies, but sometimes I am on the phone when I do it and then I wind up feeling stupid for what I say. I sit there thinking that was completely pointless and what must this person be thinking of me?! I was lying in bed the other night thinking about the verse that says “Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.” Psalm 141:3

When I get up in the morning and start my prayers I usually remember to pray about my tone. I don’t want it to be biting and negative, tearing the kids or anyone else down. But, I don’t actually remember to pray about my words!! I need to make this verse part of my morning prayers. I don’t want my words to negatively impact anyone and I know this directly affects my Christian witness.  Proverbs 25:11 states: “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.” (NKJV)

Last night after I put the kids to bed they were laughing and talking. A while later I went in to tell them I was going to bed and K said E wouldn't stop talking. He said "I can't help it. I am so tired and I can't stop talking!" The apple doesn't fall far from this tree. So, if me and my son have run of the mouth tendencies, I imagine we are not alone.

Let’s watch our careless words. Words we say in anger or frustration will always be out there. I can remember hateful words said to me as a child…and obviously I haven’t been a child for a long time. It’s not like I want to remember those words, but they tore me down and it has stuck with me. You never know what someone else is going through. It may look like they have it all together, but if we all remember the golden rule to treat others how we want to be treated, and to build each other and stop tearing each other down, we would have a lot less regrets. Words are powerful, how will you use yours today?