Not the bug :)

Today is Friday!!! Hallelujah! It has been a long week, month, year!!! However, today I am rejoicing. Why? Because it is Friday. Here are a few things I LOVE about this particular Friday:

I have had hugs and kisses from my loved ones...I am LOVED!

My loved ones are all healthy.....we are blessed!!!!

It is Friday!!!....that mean's it's the weekend!

We built a bonfire....we are blessed!

WE roasted hotdogs.....we had food to eat.....we are blessed!

The hotdogs were super yummy...........we are blessed :)!!!!

WE made smores......we are blessed :)

I had Ghiradelli Carmel chocolates that I used to make S'mores.....I am doubly blessed!!!!

Don't worry, we had the stuff for regular S'mores as well :)!!! Still blessed!!!

Matt and I sat around the bonfire talking for at least an hour....quality time...I am blessed!!!

Not every day is going to be great and sunshine and roses. The hard days make us appreciate the good days even more. So after a month or so of hard days I am incredibly thankful for this good day. I am thankful for PERSPECTIVE. I know in the scheme of things these hard days are a mere blip. I know that EVENTUALLY we will know which job Matt is going to get in Charlotte and then we will FINALLY be able to get in a routine. But, today, that doesn't matter. At least he will have a job and eventually we will get our routines back.

I hope you all have a FABULOUS FRIDAY AND AN AMAZING WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you all for your encouragement and love.

I am blessed beyond measure to have friends like YOU in my life!!

Sometimes you are the bug

This morning as I came out to the kitchen to start the coffee pot, there was a stink bug on the floor. I looked right at him and told him I wasn't messing with him. I did not want to stink the place up with all his poisonous, stinky fumes. Yesterday, I was that bug. I had a nasty attitude and if anyone had bothered to mess with me I would have been putting those stinky poisonous fumes all over the place. I don't want to make excuses, so I won't. Life is very difficult right now and I have a lot of things hitting me all at once, and I was just completely overwhelmed by life. I didn't want to be the bug. I sat down, had a good cry and tried to get all those emotions out, but it just wasn't enough. I love what Lysa TerKeurst has to say about our emotions, "I can face things that are out of my control and not act out of control." Ouch. Can I really?! I know I can, I know it is a choice, but in the heat of the moment, do I let me emotions control me? Or do I have control over my emotions. Sigh. Yesterday, my emotions definitely had the control and I acted out of control. Not only with my words, but also my eating. I won't mention what I ate or how much, but let's just say it wasn't pretty. I am not going to dwell here, but today are you the bug? Are you stuck in a seemingly impossible situation and you can't see the way out? You are tired and weary of the situation and just about everything else? Lysa has a few more words of wisdom, that speaks to my heart, and hopefully to yours as well "God does work for the good... in all things... every single thing... even our most raw and seemingly impossible things... but we must know it even when we don't feel it and let God have His way."

Reality

Last Thursday morning Matt took an additional month off of work so we could figure things out about our future and to wait on the job he had applied for. That afternoon he was notified that he did not get the job. We were devastated. All our dreams and plans were completely crushed. It would have been a promotion and a great location, closer to my family. A week later I would like to tell you that we are fine and have accepted this, but I can't. We are still in limbo, trying to make decisions and it is so incredibly hard.

 

How do you let go of a dream that was so incredible to accept a reality that looks less than good?

 

I think it starts to get easier as you realize that God has you exactly where He wants you to be. We are completely dependent upon Him for our next move. Matt had also applied for a job here in Charlotte that would be a lateral move, but we are still waiting to hear if he will get it. If not, it still looks like we will end up in Charlotte, at the demoted job and wherever they want him to be in the office. So, for those of you who were praying that we would land back in Charlotte, I want to stab you with my pencil. However, I won't, because no matter what I know we will end up exactly where God wants us to be.

So, here is what we do know:

God is still on the throne and this did not take Him by surprise.

We will be making a fresh start here, most likely a different part of Charlotte.

We head back to our retreat in TN late Monday, and will be there until next week, we come back so Kayla can get braces on March 1. This is where are plans end...we can't plan beyond this not knowing what is going to happen with Matt's job.

We are still waiting to hear from the dentist when Elijah will have his 4 teeth extracted.

Matt's start back to work date is set for March 21st, but once we hear which job he will end up in we will probably change that and go back earlier.

We are ready to be settled and not popping back and forth from state to state.

We are ready to be living in our own place without having to pull clothes out of the suitcase every day.

We are trying to create a new dream and be excited about what is going on with us.

It's hard.

We will survive this disappointment.

I am swamped in school work which is why I have not updated the blog recently.

We are still happy to be back in the states and the kids are enjoying playing outside.

This planner is learning even more to wait on the Lord and not make as many plans.

We thought we would be closer to settled by now.

I recently won a book and I am looking forward to that arriving in the mail.

God is good all the time, all the time God is good.

 

Keep praying for us, pray that Matt gets the lateral job, pray that I get to feeling better as I have major sinus pressure and don't feel good. Pray that we are able to get settled soon as the kids are still struggling with not being settled. You all are awesome and I thank God that you are a part of our lives (even those who prayed us back to Charlotte!!).