"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give a reason for the hope you have. But do this with gentleness and respect." 1 Peter 3:15

Friday, January 13, 2012

It should be easy

It should be easy...but it's not. This re-entry...repatriation to the states...returning home.
Everything seems overwhelming...you are tired, jet-lagged, have a million things to do and everyone is asking you questions you don't know the answer to.
Our time overseas changed us...a lot...it changed our perspective about things, and coming home...well, five years has changed everybody else too...everyone changes with time.
We are dealing with buying a house, getting cars, cell phones, buying things for the house...everyone here is settled...we can't just go out and have play dates...there is work to be done. I need to be getting the kids stuff ready for school next week, but I don't have my shipment yet and that is where most of our stuff is. So, I will be winging it a bit.
We have done so much shopping, something I love, but I am sick of spending money...and it's only just begun. We are starting over...there's no food in the cabinet, no spices on the rack...no condiments in the refrigerator...they don't let you carry food stuff across country lines, so we have nothing.
I'm not complaining, although I know it sounds like it. I am simply stating facts about where we are currently at.
We close on the house on Monday, the painter comes on Tuesday and Matt goes back to work on Tuesday...I start school with the kids on Tuesday and start working on moving some things into our house.
After almost 8 weeks of transition I am ready to be out of suitcases and settled into my own house, but that takes time. I am going to have to really manage my time wisely to get everything done. But, when will we have time to make friends? It's going to be hard on the kids moving into our new house...it's just another transition...have I mentioned how much Elijah does not do well with change? He hates it, he doesn't handle it well and there is a lot coming.
My head is spinning with the amount of things we've gotten done in the last three weeks and how much more there is to do. How do you explain that to someone who's never moved or lived overseas. It's like you are talking a foreign language...which in a way you are...it's amazing to land and hear the flight attendants giving you directions in your language, with no accent and you completely understand what they have said. It doesn't matter that the airport is crowded, you've seen worse. It doesn't matter that you got stuck in traffic, the drivers are not crazy here (for the most part!). It seems no one understands why you go to the grocery store and you are overwhelmed by the selections...that you can stand in the chip aisle and grab the one you know your kids will eat. That you can stand in the chocolate aisle for 10 minutes and not be able to decide what you want because you want it all and you can afford it, but you can't make the decision because there is too many options. So, you grab a huge bag that you don't need and know you are going to eat it anyway, because you are overwhelmed and it kind of makes you feel better...until you look in the mirror....
Everyone is asking if you are excited to be home. Yes, I am excited to be home, but I am overwhelmed. In some ways I want to go back to Singapore where everything was established and it was easier. We had our routine, we knew where everything was, we were involved, had friends to play with....
I am starting over, which I hate. Even though we lived in Concord before, we will be living in Charlotte, it's still starting over. We will have to figure out where the grocery stores are, where the libraries are, where the parks are etc...not to mention the weather...moving in the middle of winter, when you've not had winter for 5 years, building back up our pantry and filling up our calendar again....trying to find activities for the kids to be involved in...
But, it's all good. This too shall pass. Every change is an adjustment and it takes time. With time we will get settled, make new friends, learn our way around. We will get through this. How do I know?
Because, with Christ "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength!" Philippians 4:13
Also, "I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11